Have you been in a Relationship where you have doubts as to whether to keep or quit it? Many ladies have been there and many more are still there right now.
Somehow it seems there is a global shortage of men and many unmarried ladies may seem desperate to hook up with a man if it will end up in marriage on the long run.
But when you find yourself in a relationship sometimes you are not sure if it’s heading in the right direction and/or if it will give you peace in the long run.
So how does a lady know if this guy values her and will eventually become the man of her dreams that will marry her and build a happy future with her?
Good men can be bad and bad men can appear good therefore it can be confusing to know whether to keep or quit a relationship.
The first thing to check is can he change? Will he change for the good or will he change for the worse. Is he just changing to trap me? Or is he motivated enough to genuinely change for his good?
I guess or answers will only be a guide hence you too have a role to play to really decide what you want in life.
Change in this context means To become something different (preferably better not worse)
It’s either a man changes his NEGATIVE behaviors to become positive or he keeps going from being bad to worse. A real man should change his negative traits to become a better person.
As a very supportive lady, you expect that after you have done all you can for/with your guy, he should only exhibit positive changes i.e all round improvements. But, sometimes it doesn’t quite work out that way.
Guys sometimes refuse to change so that it will not look like you’re controlling them or they are been influenced by you. They need their own motivation to change.
A real man who truly loves and values himself, will sure know how to love, value and respect his lady. And if his ways are not suitable for her, he should be Happy to adjust to help or please her.
Ladies, note this!
There are no rules in keeping a guy faithful to you, no matter how nice you are as a woman (but still be nice oh). A guy can’t change his ‘flirting’ ways just because you told him to do so.
He has to realize your worth, values and be man enough to commit to solely to you.
He need to do that voluntarily, if you force him to change because that is what you want, It could lead to premium tears in the future. A man will voluntarily change for the person he loves without any demands or fights from you.
Men are very deliberate as such don’t accept the lies and excuses he gives you to treat you less than you deserve. If he wants to keep you, he will treat you better.. read the signs
Allow him to show you his real self so you can make up your mind better.
STOP trying to force changes on a man! if he can’t respect your time, your feelings and opinion, he can’t also respect your body. Let him go
If a man is not ready to be committed and consistent with you, Let him go. Some men will disrespect ladies, maltreat them and even ignore them and when the ladies try to voice out their opinions, the same same men will craftily turn the blame on the ladies. Please ladies, Let him go.
Learn how to cut ties with unhealthy relationships that don’t bring you peace.
A man calling you ‘baby’ means nothing. A man calling you ‘my love’ means nothing. Moving to a man’s house means nothing. Getting pregnant for him means nothing.
A man can do all this with all of the ladies in his life at the same time.
What actually means something, is a man changing his ways to keep you.
Having a child for a man, just to hold him down or make him change his mind to stay with you will not make him man-up to be committed and consistent with you. Moving to his house and acting like a wife, cleaning his house, washing his clothes, cooking for him is not also a guarantee.
For a man who is not ready for commitment and not in the right mindset to keep you, none of this will be good to him.
The reason he doesn’t appreciate you is not because you are not a good lady, but because he is not mature enough to comprehend that you are a good woman. To him, you are cheap and desperate.
A man calling you, my baby, my love, means nothing. Words are cheap, watch his actions. How is he treating you?.
Communication is key. It’s not everyone that have the same respect for words. His “I love you” has no meaning if he is not truly into you. Words can be so meaningless.
Never forget that you can’t change a man’s mind to love, be committed and consistent with you. He has to desire to change for himself and for the woman he truly loves.
Don’t waste your precious time on something that isn’t going anywhere.
The changes you should be looking for in a man is sincerity and sacrifice for the woman he loves.
All things being equal, a man who loves, respects and knows your worth will sacrifice to keep you forever. He will know exactly what to do and when to do it.
Love isn’t a burden and anything that isn’t genuine is bound to hinder your peace of mind.
This post was contributed by our guest author.. AGOFURE EJIRO
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